Bear Necessities.

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DO YOU KISS GLORIA VANDERBILT WITH THAT MOUTH?

I wonder what other words his auto-correct has saved…

SANCTUARY.

NEVER LOOKED BETTER!

SHE LOVES YOU!

Who says that Kris Kardashian used her daughters for her own fame? She was famous WAY before her daughter had sex with that guy on camera. 

She loves her friends SO much that she made a music video of herself! …for them! 

What a peach.

PS: 10 points if you spot OJ Simpson.

Another One Bites The Dust.

Weeks after “Spermin” Herman Cain dropped out of the GOP candidate race, Michele Bachmann has also announced that she has ended her bid for the Republican nomination.

IT’S ABOUT GOD DAMN TIME.

I seriously couldn’t stand one more minute of listening to her ridiculous arguments about gays, abortion, “anti-Americanism”, or even to that crazy Minnesotan accent.

SEE YOU LATER BYE BACHMANN.

But don’t be sad Michele, maybe you’ll be able to pull a Palin and get your own failed reality TV series. Here’s to hoping!

Nice Twits.

I know I just posted about her, but Courtney Stodden never ceases to amaze me. Last time I only commented on what I saw on the outside, but this time I want to learn more about the woman behind the plastic. I want to delve deeper into her subconscious and discover the real C-Stod. Thankfully Courtney is a lyrical genius, and has allowed us to see the inner workings of her peroxide damaged mind.

Aside from her apparent and extremely disturbing Santa complex (did someone get coal one year?), Mrs. Stodden beautifully exemplifies the grace and charm of the english language. 

All kidding aside, a thesaurus was clearly her Christmas gift last year and she is finally putting it to good use. And who knew that alliteration could be sexy?

OH AND PS: NO ONE WANTS TO RIDE YOUR SLIPPERY SLEIGH.

Every Amber Rose Has Its Thorn.

Smirnoff just came out with a new line of vodka called “Fluffed and Whipped“. It’s apparently named after marshmellows and whipped cream… Appetizing?

Apart from the vomit-enducing flavours, Smirnoff decided to choose the epitome of class and elegance for their spokesperson: Miss Amber Rose.

Out of all people to represent your brand, why in the world would you choose someone who usually drinks Nuvo? The only reason that I can think of is that Smirnoff needed someone who could square off against Svedka’s spokeperson.

Touché, Smirnoff, touché.

The Human Head Weighs 8 Pounds.

THEN:

Cute and adorable…

NOW:

Sweaty and uncomfortable…

Hey, you gotta pay the bills somehow…

Bosom Buddies.

Why aren’t these two best friends yet??

I wonder if Dr. 90210 has a 2-for-1 special…

Wouldn’t they have the most amazing reality TV show? 

Coco and Courtney Take Miami.

Coco and Courtney Take Reno.

Coco and Courtney Take Drugs.

PS: Both of their ages are totally crazy. One is 17 and one is 32. Is it just me or do their ages seem alarmingly off?

And the award goes to…

This seems slightly excessive. Does anyone in this cast have a name that doesn’t start with “Academy”?